you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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