you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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