He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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