Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize