You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
