I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
