have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
