idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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