Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
