stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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