Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize