Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Im part way to drunk.
Randomize
