dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
