how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
