hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize