sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
