She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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