in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
