i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize