You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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