Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
