that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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