I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
The convent might be a nice break from real life
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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