They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
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