we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
