: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
i've created a new STD.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
