This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
