Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
