With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Dick very happy bro
Randomize