I am in a vortex of obligation.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize