I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
