I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
