I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
only you would photoshop your dick
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
