I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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