apparently the secret to your success is patron
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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