new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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