just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
