We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
