It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
