Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy

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(301): View more from Maryland

do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number

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(404): View more from Georgia

My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(804): View more from Virginia

IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT

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(732): View more from New Jersey

This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.

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(662): View more from Mississippi

The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl

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(207): View more from Maine

We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.

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(708): View more from Illinois

Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid

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