Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize