i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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