she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
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