Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize