Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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