Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize