he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
