Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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