'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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