I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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